Thank You for the Pain

I wrote my 2011 reflections back in November.
And as these final hours of 2011 tick down,
I can say with absolute joy and certainty that
my God is faithful.
And He is good.

*** Year end reflections ~
originally posted November 10, 2011***

Sometimes life hurts.
And 2011 has had its share of heartache.
It's been a year of loss and change and letting go---
and it's likely not much different from yours.

As I hung my crisp new calendar last January,
I had no idea what awaited.
The days back then were still empty, white squares,
just waiting to be filled.
I couldn't know that early in that first week of the new year,
our church family would experience a devastating,
unexpected loss of one far too young.

As the winter snows melted into spring
the robins returned with their song.
Though the world seemed to be coming alive again,
we were reminded---time after time---that
our bodies are passing away.
Our hearts ached as we bid farewell
to two beloved neighbors---one on either side of us---
who lost their courageously fought battles with cancer,
both within a month's time.
In the midst of those losses, and without warning,
we held the hands of friends who received the diagnosis that no one wants to hear.
Only one month after the diagnosis, he was home with Jesus.

A week after his homegoing, our cheeks still wet with tears,
I received the phone call I'd never dreamed in a million years.
My precious friend had, unexpectedly, passed away from complications due to her cancer. 

With a still aching heart,
the end of June brought the day I'd been dreading since February.
Another dear friend was moving away,
only this time it wasn't to heaven---
it was just a mere 80 minute drive away.
Still---just too far.

The dry earth of June mimicked our hearts.
We were dry and parched and thirsty for God.
We needed Him to meet us...to fill us...to rain down with His comfort and peace.

The summer months brought additional change and transition---
good change, mind you, but change that
rearranged our lives,
left us feeling somewhat lost and vulnerable,
and brought an increasingly familiar heartache.

When the questions swirled
and our hearts laid raw,
there was still indescribable hope.
joy.
quiet assurance.

Not one moment of these past months has gone
undetected, unnoticed by our God.
He's seen each tear and hurt;
He's heard each cry and plea;
He's felt our anguish and grief.

And in the center of each trial,
He has been there,
carrying us,
sustaining us,
comforting us;
investing the ache and the pain
to make us look more like Him
and captivate
our hearts,
our attention,
and our affections.

Even through days and seasons of pain,
our hope is firmly rooted in Him.
He is our joy.
And this Thanksgiving, I'm thankful.

*Below is a song that has greatly ministered to me over the past couple of years. I pray God uses it to sing truth and comfort over your life.
***Please pause music at bottom of page if you wish to view this video.