Real

I've been working on this blog entry for nearly two months.
Even as I sensed God prompting me this morning, "It's time,"
I hesitated to click the "publish" button.
It might make you uncomfortable.  It makes me uncomfortable.
It might seem confrontational.  I hate confrontation.
Yet I can't tell you how strongly God's been impressing these words on my heart.
Please take them with all the love and grace they were intended.
Let us grow together in grace and truth.

***

There's a trend these last few years. 
And it's increasingly making my heart ache.

It's called being "real."

Now, don't get me wrong---I am all for being real:
I want to do real life within community.
I long to share my real struggles and disappointments with trusted friends.
I yearn to walk through trials together,
weeping with those who weep.
I want to humbly admit I don't have it all together---
that there are days I go off on my husband and sons;
that I'm a selfish, jealous, cracked vessel, so desperately in need of grace.

Without fail, it seems, when we hear a friend honestly sharing her day to day struggles, we follow up by making that familiar 3-word statement:
"She's so real."

Realness is lauded and honored above all. 

But why is it, reading friends, that we don't have the same apparent enthusiasm over hearing about the real heart change God is doing in her life?

how He's shaping her heart to look more like His?
how He's changing her from the inside out and making her reflect Him?
how He's helping her turn from the old way of life and embrace holiness?
how He's given her a contentedness and joy in what He's called her to do?

Here's where my heartache comes in.
Tell me this, Bloggy World.

Tell me why we have convinced ourselves and one another that commiserating, complaining about, and simply enduring life is real,
while walking in joy and hope and contentment is somehow perceived as fake?

Why is it that if a sister in Christ gladly but humbly testifies that God is conforming her to the image of His Son, we assume she's hiding something?

Why is it that we get excited when she shares about her lost battles and sin ("Phew...her issues are worse than mine!")
but we despise and disdain her when she testifies that God has given her victory over that same sin?

Could it be, dear sisters...*gulp*...envy?

It pains me to suggest that. 
'Cause the truth is, there have been times---many times---
I've been envious over a friend's joy and triumphs. 
I want her circumstances to be mine. 
I want her victory. her blessing. her life.
I want to jump the fence to where it's greener.
I want to skip the hard work and struggle of my particular season and get right to the celebration.

If, however, that same friend is spinning her tires and living in defeat,
at least then I can feel better about myself. 
In a twisted way, I can look at a friend's shortcomings and puff myself up.
Or maybe I just rationalize my own sin.

Friends, this ought not be. 

The truth is, we're dirty rotten sinners. 
This is real.
It's also true that God hates sin.
He sent His Son, Jesus, for us---
the sinful, the broken, the empty.
Afterall, if we weren't in that condition,
there would be no reason for Him to come.
Through His death and resurrection,
we can have life.  Real life.
He forgives.  He heals.  He restores. 
He redeems life from the pit.
He breathes new life.
Authentic life.
Abundant life.
Real life.

And so, my friends, let us be real with one another. 
Let us weep with those who weep.
Let us rejoice with those who rejoice.
And let us keep our eyes on Jesus,
the One who is strongly and faithfully at work
to make beautiful things out of us.