[prize him]

"Older women...train the young women to love their husbands..."

Titus 2:4

We seem to have time for everything we deem as important, don't we?

• haircuts
• manicures
• night out with the girls
• time at the gym
• "down" time for ourselves

 But when was the last time you scheduled time alone with your husband?

Oh, we have lots of excuses:

• Lack of money
• Lack of time
• Demands of small children
• Kids' outside commitments
• Tiredness
• Simply assuming he will do it (and waiting for him to do so---I'm guilty, by the way)

The truth is, the perfect time doesn't come along very often.  Unless we're intentional and plan for it, time alone with our husbands won't happen.  While we may find ourselves in a crazy season of parenting little ones who are dependent upon us for their every need---or parenting teenage night owls whose schedule adds a whole new interesting dynamic to the family---we must not simply let the days tick by, hoping and assuming our husband knows that he is our #1 earthly relationship.

The wise woman remembers she will begin and end as a wife.

~ Charlie Shedd

Take it to heart, dear one.  That one with whom you made a covenant before God was there before those children arrived.  And by God's grace, when the children have flown away and the nest is empty, it will be just the two of you again.  Are you investing these days in being friends and building your relationship so that one day when you're left alone, you'll not be strangers?

How do we intentionally invest in one another in our current season?

Early bedtimes were a gift to us in the season of parenting young ones!  Our boys now laugh about how they'd be in bed at 7:30 during the summer, looking yearningly out the window at their friends playing outside.  Now, that may be a bit of an exagerration (I think it was more like 8pm), but the point is, their early bedtimes allowed us to have a quiet evening together.  Finances didn't always make it possible to go out, but those "at-home" dates were needed and treasured.  Sometimes we'd play Scrabble.  Other times we'd watch a movie.  Once in a while we'd order a pizza or calzone (and more than once got busted by inquiring noses who wandered back down the stairs---they were convinced we'd say to one another, "The boys are in bed!  Let's order pizza!").  Sometimes I'd feed the boys dinner at the usual time and wait until they were in bed to make a romantic dinner for two. 

While the at-home dates were always appreciated, there were times this girl simply needed to get out of the house. Surrounded by a glaring "to-do" list, it was sometimes difficult for me to unwind during at-home dates, knowing that there was a full laundry basket staring back at me. So then what?  Swap childcare with another couple.  There are a lot of couples who are eager and chomping at the bit to enjoy a date with their spouse, but childcare is an issue.  Take turns watching each other's kids while the other couple goes out. 

Dates don't have to be an expensive sit-down dinner in a fancy-schmancy restaurant.

• Pick up cheap coffee (or brew your own) and take it to the lake
• Stroll the aisles and dream at your local home improvement store
• If you're inclined to do so, go for a run together
• Take a picnic to the park
• Go out for ice cream or dessert
• Go for a bike ride
• Take a drive to the country with the windows down
• Enjoy morning coffee together on your front porch (or couch)
• Slow dance in the kitchen
• Go out for breakfast

And every once in a while, do it big.  Plan.  Scrimp.  Save---whatever you have to do to make it possible to steal away for a night or two.  Your marriage will be refreshed and encouraged and your children will see parents who are feeding and nurturing their relationship.  What security it gives them to see parents who love and enjoy one another!

What ways have you found to invest time in your beloved?

Let's take delight in loving and planning for our husbands!