[the dripping of rain]

We've begun some long-anticipated home improvement projects at our house.
The first, it seemed, was simple enough:
transform a small utility closet into a small half bath.
Easy enough, right?
Electrician brother?  Check.
Friend plumber?  Check.
Friend builder?  Check.
Use leftover tiles from our kitchen remodel,
throw in a toilet and a pedestal sink.
Voila!
I'm thinking one week,
two weeks tops.

But these home improvement projects are never as simple as we think, are they?
As my husband began removing plaster,
he discovered rotten wood beneath.
Long story short,
rain had been leaking into our home via an upstairs airing porch for years.
It ran down the inside of that outer wall, undetected,
and began wreaking havoc behind the scenes.

My husband has been hard-at-work to remedy the situation:
tearing down the old porch,
ripping out and replacing old wood.
And despite my initial frustration about the
added work, expense, and delay,
God has been using it to bring a picture into detailed focus.
Proverbs 19:13-14...

A foolish son is ruin to his father,
    and a wife's quarreling is a continual dripping of rain.
¹⁴ House and wealth are inherited from fathers,
    but a prudent wife is from the Lord.

Ouch.

God says that the nagging and quarreling of a wife---

of me---

is like a constant dripping of rain.

Drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip...

Annoying.

Some might even say that after a while,

they no longer hear the drip.

They've tuned it out,

yet nothing has changed.

There's still that 

drip, drip, drip, drip, drip, drip.

And it's wreaking havoc.

The structure is softening, rotting, disintegrating.

Oh, friends:  this is a picture of our negative words, nagging, and quarreling upon our husbands..

Negative word upon negative word

breaks down.

Tears down.

Eats away and destroys.

Conversely,

wisdom builds.

It loves.

Supports.

Prays.

It thinks before opening its mouth

and waits.

It respects

and gives

and forgives.

It extends grace.

And this wisdom, says Proverbs---this woman who gives careful thought to her words and their effect---is a gift from the Lord.  

Oh, I don't want to be like the annoying drip of rain

that eventually has ugly long-term ramifications

like the undetected drip of rain in our home.

Admittedly, my heart settles for that far too often.

Intent upon my way and my plan 

(and oblivious to the damage out of sight),

I nag. And complain. And mutter a heart of ungratefulness.

Oh, that God would take control of my heart and my mouth;

that He'd use it to encourage and bless my husband---

and our sons.

I long to be a perpetual fountain of joy

that brings refreshment to the hearts of all those in my path

and reflects the One who lives within me.

How about you, reading friend?

What kind of effect are your words having upon the ones you hold dear?