"I'll Make Him a Helper..."

Oh, how I thank God for His continual work in our hearts and lives! I share the following from my heart and ask that God use it to encourage you and fill you with hope.

We've been in the ministry for 14 years, and for several of those years, I deeply struggled with feelings of jealousy and resentment toward my husband. I resented the many hours he spent away from home while I was left home alone to care for and nurture three young boys. It seemed that he led such a charmed life! He was able to communicate with adults throughout the day, enjoy lunch appointments, and receive encouragement and affirmation from co-workers and others. In my mind, he just had it made!

To add insult to injury, my husband would often return home for a brief supper, only to leave again for evening meetings and obligations. That left me to patiently (or not-so-patiently) train and nurture the hearts of our boys. And sadly, when my husband was home, I'd frequently be whining about the times when he wasn't...so even the time we did have together was stressful!

I'm so grateful that in the midst of my pity party, God led me to read "A Woman After God's Own Heart" and "Beautiful in God's Eyes" by Elizabeth George. Through these books, He began tilling up the soil of my heart and giving me a fresh vision for my marriage and my home. The words 'I am on assignment from God to help my husband' funneled right into my heart. A lightbulb went on in my head (one of those "duh" moments) when I recognized that my husband is supposed to win, and I'm on assignment to help make that victory possible. A man of influence is the wife's gift to society. By caring for our home and our children, I'm contributing to my husband's reputation and his ability to minister. WOW!

Oh, how God convicted my heart through those books! And then there was this quote, "Shunning the spotlight, she gladly gives her life behind the scenes so that her husband may be noticed and honored. She is glad when he is the center of attention, when he excels, when he is recognized, when he rises to the top. Indeed, she delights in living in his shadow. His promotion is her greatest reward. She desires that her husband be highly respected and esteemed, so she contentedly offers the supreme sacrifice of herself for him."

My husband had always said he needed me...and sadly, I never understood what he meant. I selfishly thought, "Yeah, you need me to cook and clean and care for the boys and..." It's just in the last several years that I understand that he really and truly needs me. He cannot be the man God has called him to be without me embracing the call God has placed on my life...to help and support and fill him up.

Not only do I embrace that truth...I rejoice in it!